True confession. I once, long ago, got caught shoplifting a copy of Tiger Beat from a grocery store. Yes, it's true. Sadly, I had the money to pay for it, but I couldn't let myself be seen buying a magazine with shirtless boys on the cover. Could not do it. So, naturally, I stole it. Or tried to. Had it been a copy of Playboy, no problem! I was buying Playboy (for the articles) from age 16 with no shame, and no questions asked. But Playboy marked me as a heterosexual, and Tiger Beat marked me as... something else.
On another occasion I successfully excised a centerfold from some teen rag on a drug store magazine rack. It was a full body portrait of Jimmy McNichol, lying on the floor. He was wearing white overalls, no shirt, one nipple artfully exposed. I had to have it, so I carefully pulled it out of its rightful home and stuck it into a copy of Esquire, which I was going to buy anyway, and it was mine.
It's hard to recall in this era of social media when every teen idol
has a Facebook page, as well as an Instagram, Keek, and Twitter account, that in those days if you wanted to find out about a star you liked there was nowhere to turn but the teen mags. They gave a remarkably false impression of the world these kids lived in, making it seem as if they were all wise beyond their years, clean-cut, heterosexual, hardworking, studious, and drug-free, and most of all, single and looking. Teen fan magazines still exist, but they aren't what they once were, although the content is remarkably similar. I suppose that someone still reads them, or at least pulls out the pinups in them and sticks them on their walls. If the internet had existed then, I, a teenager who was not yet out, never would have taken the chance of getting caught stealing Jimmy McNichol's photo. I would have found it on the internet, and "enjoyed" it on my computer. Times change, and not always for the worse.
Below, some examples of what a young Vera was secretly salivating over.
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| Robby Benson |
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| Sean Astin |
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| Willy Aames |
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| Christopher Atkins |
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| Scott Baio |
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| Ian Mitchell (briefly of Bay City Rollers) |
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| Clark Brandon |
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| C. Thomas Howell |
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| Jimmy McNichol |
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| Leif Garrett |
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| Matt Dillon |
Comments
I think one of the hottest (perverted) photos at that time was in a school book about Alexander the Great as a boy. There was a section in the book about Alexander learning about Greek culture by performing in a play about Prometheus, and they even had an illustration of a phenomenally hot teenage Alexander bound stretched backward over a rock so that the vulture could come every day to eat out his liver as a punishment from the gods for his bringing light to mankind. The young Alexander enacting that punishment wore nothing but a tiny slip of cloth covering his crotch. This illustration turned me on like nobody's business and I was in second grade!
When I was around 10 years old, I would go to a barber shop to get a haircut and read Batman and Superman comics while waiting my turn. One day, I was searching through the magazine stack to find a comic I hadn't read yet, when I came across a 50s muscle magazine (I don't know which one). I didn't dare touch it, but the whole time my hair was getting cut, that magazine seemed to rattle there like it was a coiled rattlesnake.
Another time, when I as a very young teenager, I was walking down a street in a seedy downtown neighborhood, and walked past a magazine stand where my eyes caught right there on display some Physique Pictorials, and a "DemiGods" that nearly made me explode right then and there. But I just kept on walking!
Finally, when I was college age, I learned that there was a porn shop next to the bus station and while my heart pounded the first time I went in there to buy something, I did do it, and based on the kind of things they had in there, I figured I needn't worry about the sales clerk, he must have seen it all and whatever his judgement of me might have certainly would not have mattered very much!
I loved all those magazines, but the Internet would have been a godsend!.
too. Cool blog!
-Doodle